Friday, April 3, 2009

your questions, final installment

People!!!!

Are you crazy? Asking me for parenting advice?

Do you not remember this -- the whole your-kid-breaks-his-finger-and-you-never-treat-him- for-it incident????

It's like hiring the lol cats to teach your kid to spell.

funny pictures of cats with captions


But since you asked, I can haz answerz. And I'll even throw in a recipe at the end.

I will try to refrain from supplementing each answer with a lol catz picture. You can thank me for that later.

And now, my Dr. Spock's two cents worth.

Get out your notebooks and prepare yourself to take copious amounts of notes to review at your pleasure.


*Ahem*


Are you ready?

Question #1 from Bonnie: "okay, here's my question: how do i get my baby to sleep through the night?"

Seconded by Kellie: "Well right now as I am trying to ignore my screaming baby who doesn't want to go back to be I am think of the same question as bonnie jack."


Bonnie and Kellie, are you ready for this?

Here it is, everything I know about getting babies to sleep through the night:
Did you get that?

Listen carefully, and I'll tell you again:What? You only heard crickets?


Ahh. That explains it. All I can say, is good luck. And don't be afraid to let them cry. And maybe a warm bath before bedtime will help. Either for you or for the baby. Baths used to wear my babies out. Other than that, I recommend you read here for more information.


Kellie also asked: "what is a good way to get my boys to eat breakfast, lunch or dinner when we are eating those meals?"

Kellie, a sure-fire way to help your cute boys eat is to feed them only candy for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. But really, who's to say when breakfast is? In the lunchroom, we love to have waffles for dinner -- but usually only when PB&J is out of town. He's old-fashioned that way. Not quite what you were hoping for, I know. And I'm sorry. But good luck with that!


And finally, The Daily Family implores:

"Please, please tell me what is the secret I have missed to successful potty-training??(since we're talking about potties and questions, that is)"

Here in the Lunchroom, potty training never really worked until my kids were 2 1/2. After that, everything came out ok. I tried it earlier than that with the Oldest (when I was still ambitious and full of dreams) but 2 1/2 seemed to be the magic age in our family. I don't know why.

So there you go. A whole bunch of completely unsatisfactory answers to the hardest job on earth.

I just hope and pray everything will work out ok and my kids won't be totally messed up when they are grown.

Please join me in a moment of silence.
For the children.

And the mothers.

Thank you.

And now, to reward you for your good behavior, here's a crazy recipe from the Pioneer Woman that my blog friend Allyson pointed me to. Apple Dumplings made magical through a can of Mountain Dew.

Speaking of caffeine, I was in a store yesterday that had a sign up that read:

"Unattended children will be given a Red Bull and a free puppy."

If that's not a threat . . .

Anyway, back to the recipe. Yes, you read that right. Mountain Dew. Now, I am not a connoisseur of Mountain Dew, but I am willing to give this a try, just because I like a good miracle. And if these are half as good as Allyson says, I think they would rate as a miracle in my book.

Have a look at the recipe:

Pioneer Woman's Apple Dumplings

2 Granny Smith apples
2 cans crescent rolls
2 sticks butter
1 1/2 cups sugar
1 teaspoons vanilla
cinnamon
1 small can Mountain Dew

Peel and core apples. Cut apples into 8 slices each. Roll each apple slice in a crescent roll. Place in a 9 x 13 buttered pan. Melt butter, then add sugar and barely stir. Add vanilla, stir, and pour over apples. Pour Mountain Dew around the edges of the pan. Sprinkle with cinnamon and bake at 350 degrees for 40 minutes. Serve with ice cream, and spoon some of the sweet sauces from the pan over the top.

And here's the link, so you can admire Pioneer Woman's photography.

Enjoy!

And enjoy the challenges of being a mom. I wish I was more help. I really do.

Have a great Good Food Friday!


meadow picture by dr3wie

cricket picture by benM135
see more
Lolcats and funny pictures

6 comments:

bonnie jack said...

no fair. you can't refer me back to my own blog for the answer to my question! but it's okay. i know the answer now. are you ready for it? the answer is that NOBODY KNOWS THE ANSWER. people who tell you they do have deluded themselves into believing they figured something out, when really whatever they did just worked for that child at that time because that child was ready for it to work, and it's not necessarily going to work for any other child at any other time. wow, i think i have another blog post here.

and your kids are going to turn out great.

Jeanne said...

ditto - that's the truth for potty-training too. Just wish there was a magic spell for that one...pottius trainus!

momtherunner said...

I agree with bonnie jack! There is some wisdom there! And ditto on you having great kids...they are going to be fabulous people and then they will have kids and get their turn!!

Allyson said...

I am so glad you liked the Apple Dumpling recipe, it has like changed my life...or at least it does while I am eating it.

As for the parenting advice, I do not presently have a practical use for it (except for when my shoulder angel needs a little backup) but I have to say that I admire all mothers. How you all get everything done is beyond me as I have only me to keep clean, clothed, and fed...and well even these tasks are a work in progress...;)

Kate said...

dessert with Mountain Dew makes me nervous....

Nanette said...

So does this *sniff* mean you're NEVER going to visit us?