Wednesday, January 30, 2008

feeling hungry?

The R.S. President asked me to make a handout for our upcoming Visiting Teaching Conference. The theme is Feed My Sheep. Here's what I came up with. Which one do YOU think I should give the R.S. President?

Number 1, Pastoral Picnic?
Number 2, Just Ewe and Me?
Number 3, Sheep and Lambs (Ear)?
Number 4, Just an Old-Fashioned Lunchtime?
Or Number 5, Trite Ad Reference?
Really #5 should say "Got Living Water?" but that could be construed as being a little irreverent.

Go ahead and vote in my poll, but hurry. I've got to get the winner made before Sunday.
Disclaimer: I'm not really serious about a couple of these. They were just fun to make.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

what is wrong with this picture?


I blame Jane Austen for the world's freckle prejudice. If Lydia hadn't labeled Mary King as "that nasty freckled thing", people would be more inclined to embrace freckles as the sign of beauty they really are.

Like Mom says, "A face without freckles is like a sky without stars."


I never liked that Lydia.

A lot of good a simpering, smirking flawless complexion

did for her.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

robins eggs

Oh look! The Oldest Carrot Stick and her aunt were caught putting on blue Robin Egg lipstick! Not only a delicious candy, but, in a pinch, an effective cosmetic.
I love photoshop.
(Can you tell I'm putting off making dinner?)

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

who's in charge here?

I overheard this exchange between the Oldest Carrot Stick and her friend this afternoon:

Carrot Stick: "So, you know Olivia Stone*?"

Friend: "Yeah"

CS: "She's so cute! She's just adorable! You know she's going out with Josh Groovan?

F: "No way!"

CS: "Yeah, she doesn't really want to. I asked her why she doesn't just break up with him, and she said she can't, 'cause Ty Binder is in charge."

F: "Oh"

Oh.

Oh???

The conversation quickly went onto a new, seemingly random tangent full of giggling and "oh my gosh!" and a few "he's so cute!!" But I lagged behind, stuck wondering "Why is Ty Binder in charge?" I don't know. And I guess I just wouldn't understand, because I'm not in junior high.

(apparently Josh asked Ty to ask Olivia out because he thinks Olivia is hot and Olivia told Ty to tell Josh yes she would go out with him even though she doesn't really like him and now she would break up with him except that Ty said she can't because Josh really likes her but Josh and Olivia don't really even talk so what the point is I don't know but this is sure a long rambling sentence devoid of all punctuation and thank goodness Olivia does everything Ty says because he is in charge of everything after all and all I can say is thank goodness I am not twelve anymore.)

However, I am still trying to figure out why I 'm not in charge.


Really, what good is being a parent if you can't be in charge of anything?


*names have been changed to protect the innocent and the ignorant.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

happy anniversary!

My little sister (Lovely Knock-Kneed Assistant) and her husband (Mr. Beaver Mtn.)
((I guess that technically makes her Mrs. Beaver Mtn. -- but Knock Kneed Assistant is ever-so-much-more picturesque))
recently celebrated their anniversary. I found this picture on Flickr the other day, and it really represents everything I could wish for them in their marriage. So--


Happy Anniversary Mr. and Mrs. Beaver Mtn, may your romance last a long, long time!

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

fast food nation?

This weekend, Mr. Beaver Mountain and his Lovely Knock-Kneed Assistant
introduced the Carrot Sticks
to Pizza and French Fries.

Not that.
This -- nice, cold Pizza ...

and French Fries ...

It was a beautiful day, and it was fun to watch the kids having fun and learning from the pros. If you have any doubts about their skills, check out this (as an added bonus, you can also see the littlest Carrot Stick in action)

Maybe some day, the Carrot Sticks will have those kinds of skills.

Till then, as Mr. Beaver Mountain says,

"If you french fry
when you're supposed to pizza,
you're gonna have a bad time!"

I, very obligingly, proved his point several times.

I ate a lot of snow.
It did not taste like pizza or french fries.

Thank you anyway, Mr. Beaver Mountain and Lovely Assistant, for a great day!

Sunday, January 6, 2008

i heart photoshop

Photoshop is the best!
I love it when I can make a simple little job into something big and monstrous, with a life of its own.
Take your run-of-the-mill hum-drum boring old Relief Society lesson schedule. Add a few hours of messing around in photoshop. Presto: the new (and improved) Relief Society lesson schedule/bookmark -- complete with an official Joseph Smith Jr. signature and picture of the Sacred Grove in the background.
Good stuff, I tell you.
(Albeit I worry the older ladies might have to get out their magnifying glasses in order to actually read it. But sacrifices must be made for Art's sake.)
I know you wish you could come to my ward so you too could get great bookmarks like this, and my wonderful nativity handout.
You are welcome, anytime.
(I know, I know,"Who is Art, and why are we sacrificing for him?")


Thursday, January 3, 2008

finally coming off the holiday high


The holidays are finally over.

The kids are back to school.

PB&J's back to work.

I've shopped all the after Christmas sales.

And all that remains is to clean everything up, put away all the Christmas decorations, purge, and organize all the junk.

And purge. And purge. And purge some more.

This purging is meant to be all encompassing.

I guess that means I'd better throw away all the Christmas candy. And go through sugar detox. And swear off sweets, and possibly all carbs, for the next 11 months. But boy, we did have some good eats.

And then it starts all over again.

What was the best part of your holidays?