Tuesday, August 12, 2008

trading treats tuesday

Ah. Trading Treats Tuesday. How I love alliteration. And assonance. And especially onomatopoeia. But alliteration's the rhetorical device any English major (or English speaker) can really get behind. Trite, but true.


My Treat this week is: Trying New Things.

Hard to do sometimes.

Sometimes, at the Swimming Pool Of Life, you are dragged, kicking and screaming, onto the Diving Board of New Things, and though you might try to Hang On For Dear Life, Life's Lifeguard will somehow find a way to Throw You In. (Strangely Capitalized Words courtesy of John Bunyan's "Pilgrim's Progress". It's another English Major Obscure Classic.)


True, people might be standing on the side, bemusedly observing your torment. And taking pictures. But, miraculously, there are often Helpful Hands waiting to catch you, when you finally get Pushed In.


Recently, I, your dear Lunch Lady, was pushed, Kicking and Screaming (Weeping, Wailing, and Gnashing My Teeth) into the Pool of Being a Parent of a Real Teen-Age Girl.



It'll be ok, though, right?



We'll all survive this New Thing, right?





Hello?





Helpful Hands?







Anyone?













What's your Treat Today? Come on in, the water's fine!

(Thanks to the Poor Terrified Kid for the great picture fodder)

18 comments:

So many blogs..too little time said...

My new treat to try is a new calling that I am just so excited about ;)

The Margin Wight said...

Somehow I find the image of a beautiful lifeguard tossing a scared pudgy kid into a pool in front of his female peers a poignant metaphor for life. Humiliation. Listen, I have three teen-age girls and they're all wonderful in their own way. My advice is to ride the wave with a smile on your face. Hope and pray and love. Talk. Encourage goodness. Choose your battles carefully. Ask yourself with every encounter, is this the hill I want to die on? If not, seek compromises that make everyone happy or at least comfortably unaggressive. But most of all, love, talk, laugh, enjoy. Shoot your television, put your internet under round the clock surveillance, and don't feel bad about random, invasive monitoring. A child's bedroom, in my opinion, is not independent, sovereign territory; it is subject to the laws and enforcement of the parents. Also, have the courage to have the "talks" not just once, but on many occasions as you deem appropriate. You know the talks? Drugs? Sex? College? All of that. Be aware of friends. Who are your children hanging with? Who do they talk to? Specific questions asked with a smile and a hug are rarely rebuffed in my experience. Well, enough random advice. Good luck. I have one in college now and one married off, and it feels good to see that they have become responsible and beautiful young women. I wish the same for you.

the lunch lady said...

Thanks for the great advice! -- I really like "is this the hill I want to die on."

kninsa said...

My Tuesday treat is: body butter. What a marvelous invention!

the lunch lady said...

for you or Shem?

Head Nurse or Patient- you be the judge said...

I didn't die with my first teenager- it is the few coming after at a dead run that have me scared. I really appreciate the advice too- as it is so truly what it takes- control- but freedom it is a delicate balancing act. I was so very blessed with a forgiving son- so when I did get out of balance, he forgave me.

And for what it is worth- the oldest carrotstick is off to a great start- better than a few I know.

The Hawkins said...

My treat today is going to the grocery store with no kids.

Melanie said...

My Tuesday treat is a sweet husband who takes care of everything in the morning while I *sickly* sleep in. Of course, it might be more of a treat if I wasn't sick...

Happy birthday to the oldest carrotstick yesterday! --and good luck to her mom-- I'm sure I'll be coming to you for advice in a few years.

Jenni said...

My Tuesday Treat is "Otter Pops" on my front porch with my two year old on a very very hot sunny day.

Kate said...

my treat today is my new radiator. I love new things, all shiny and new. Although I prefer new things that I can wear, but oh well.

the lunch lady said...

Laura -- anytime you can go to the store without kids is a good thing.

Melanie -- I'm sorry you are sick. Get better soon!

Jenni -- you make me feel all nostalgic. If only the Oldest Carrotstick were still 2.

And Kate -- I'm sorry about your radiator. There are so many better ways to spend that much money.

Amy said...

I guess my new treat is getting to work with you! yay..i hope you can say that after working with me. Maybe I better bring a take five with me to our meetings..You will survive the teenage years just fine. Just make sure there are no dreams about future spouses until she is at least 25..or older.

Mr. Beaver Mountain said...

I think that turning 13 is merely a technicality in the Oldest Carrotstick's road to teenage-hood. Don't worry, she's been a teen for at least a year now and so far you are doing great.

My Tuesday treat (Wednesday) are some truely exceptional choc. chip cookies.

Farm Girl said...

um,that last comment was fom me.

the lunch lady said...

Amy, I already know you are the best! I am really excited to get to work with you!

Melanie said...

Maybe some of these ideas will help :)
http://suburbancorrespondent.blogspot.com/2008/03/teen-girl-survival-guide.html
At least they made me laugh, until I thought "Oh no, what in the world am I in for???"

the lunch lady said...

very very funny.

and frighteningly true.

Kristen said...

my oldest turned 8 yesterday. i just keep praying that my kids aren't the kind of teenagers that their parents were....

treat! I bought a key lime pie today! from Costco! And I had a piece! And got totally sick to my stomach!

*sigh*